There was a tag on twitter called #WhyWomenDontReport (trigger warning for rape in this and the twitter tag). It inspired me to list some reasons why women don’t report their rape or abuse. I’m going to list them here.
- We may be financially dependent upon our abuser/rapist.
- We may be married to our rapist so we, and others, don’t consider it rape.
We may have been told all our lives what we went through was “normal”.
- We see other victims get dragged through the mud and we’re scared that’ll happen to us.
- The police don’t believe us.
- Our friends and family don’t believe us.
- Family and friends blame us for what happened.
- We blame ourselves for what happened.
- We’re too young to realize what’s happening.
- We’re too young to know reporting is an option.
- We’re kids and our rapist is a kid, so it’s written off as “kids just playing doctor.”
- Our rapist/abuser is in a position of power so no one will believe us over them.
- Our rapist is a member of the church.
- Our rapist is a high-ranking member of the church.
- Our rapist is the leader of the church.
- Our rapist is a family member.
- Our rapist is a parent
There’s a myriad of reasons why women don’t report their rape or abuse. I only covered a small fraction of them here. That’s why you never ask a woman why didn’t she just report.