Posted in 365 Days of Blogging

Day 179: Acceptable vs Unacceptable Fatties

The world just loves to divide fat people (specifically fat women) into two groups. I like to call them the Acceptable and Unacceptable fatties. Even so-called “body positive” people and organizations do this. I’ve talked about it before but it still makes me angry.

The acceptable fatty has big breasts, a big butt, thick thighs, and a flat stomach. This shape is, most of the time, achieved through the use of waist trainers, Spanx, and other body shapers, but that doesn’t matter. Well, it doesn’t matter until you take it off and then they feel “fat-fished”. (It’s like catfishing but for fat people.) In short, the acceptable fatty is the fuckable one. They make cis men’s dicks hard so they’re desirable.

The unacceptable fatty is just fat. She’s funny shaped fat. She may have a flat butt, big stomach, and/or small breasts. This one doesn’t make the majority of cis men’s dicks hard, so she gets the brunt of the ridicule. She’s the one who gets mooed at in the street. She’s the one who can’t find anything that fits her properly in the store. She’s the one who receives most of your “but your health” trolling and she’s the one who becomes a fetish.

“Chubby chasers”, BBW, SSBBW, us funny shaped fat girls are the fetish. We’re the “dirty little secret” of cis men around the globe. They won’t admit to liking you in public, but they’ll be all in your DMs begging to have sex with you. We’re the ones who end up in secret relationships. He won’t claim you in front of his friends and family, refuses to take you to work functions, but is the most “loving” boyfriend/husband in private. In short, the unacceptable fatty is the “won’t say she’s fuckable in public, but try my hardest to fuck her and jerk off to BBW porn in secret” fatty.

These are things that happen constantly. Talk to any fat woman anywhere and they will tell you some version of this. People don’t want to talk about it though. Why? Because fat bodies as a whole are still not accepted. We’re told to take sexual harassment as a “compliment” and take unsolicited advice because it’s for our own good. We’re told that because our BMI is above a certain number, we are a disease that needs to be eradicated. No one wants to discuss this problem because they believe that fat people deserve it simply because they’re fat.

I call bullshit on all of this. Fat people don’t deserve this treatment. We don’t deserve to be treated like a dirty little secret, harassed, turned into a fetish object, or treated like a disease. We deserve to be treated with respect because we are human too. If you have a problem with that, that’s your issue to deal with not ours.



I'm a simple single mom living a complicated life.

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