Since you people won’t quit, I won’t either.
It turns out there’s way more than just ten things that us bi folks really don’t like hearing. So, let’s go through another list of what not to say. Ever.
“So, which side is better?”
Oh this one’s easy. The non-biphobic side. You know, the one you’re not on.
“You’re not capable of monogamy.”
Is this your fancy way of saying (again) that we’re cheaters? Ugh. You do know straight people cheat too, right? That’s not exclusive to bi people. Also, non-monogamous relationships (that aren’t cheating) are a thing. Not being capable of monogamy isn’t something to be shameful of (unless you’re a cheater and in that case, fuck you).
Continue reading “10 More Things Bi People Are Sick of Hearing”
#BlackBiBeauty was everything I wanted it to be and more. I’m amazed at the amount of people who participated on tumblr, Facebook (yes, I saw y’all), and on twitter. I also want to send out a big thank you to applewriter on twitter for helping make this happen. I was nervous about it at first, but I’m glad I did it. The outcome was definitely worth it.
The sense of community was what I was going for and I think we got it. I heard from so many people how they were finally able to participate in a hashtag and how they felt represented for the first time. A very good discussion was had about how Black bisexual men are vilified in our community.
Continue reading “#BlackBiBeauty Was A Success!”
So, I had an idea. A bad idea probably, but an idea nonetheless.
Black bisexual people catch shit from all sides. We get labeled as gay when we come out or told we don’t exist. Black bi men get told they’re the cause of HIV in the Black community because “DL”. Black cishet women are biphobic as all hell (don’t try to deny it). Black bi women are treated as personal sex toys by cishet Black men. Black bi women are also told we’re destroying the Black community because stuff? Reasons? Things? I haven’t really figured it out and neither have the biphobic people in question.
To counter this shitstorm of negativity, I wanted something where Black bisexual individuals could show ourselves being happy and cute because we are. I also want to show all the closeted Black bisexual people and the Black bisexual babies out there that they aren’t alone. We’re out here and we’re here for you.
So, the last Saturday of this month (March 25th), if you’re Black and bi and want some way to participate, use the hashtag #BlackBiBeauty on twitter, tumblr, even Facebook. Post a selfie of you just being happy. Post a pic of you and your partner in love. Show people that we’re still bi no matter who we date. Tell your story about being Black and bisexual. I want to hear and see it all.
The rhetoric around “coming out” has everyone thinking it’s a one-time thing. That’s not exactly true for anyone on the TBLG spectrum, but doubly so for the B. It’s one of the only things I hate about being bisexual. I have to come out all the time to almost everyone, including some of the same people.
Not only do I have to “come out” to straight people, I have to do it for everybody else too. The LG bit of the TBLG+ section of people can be straight up, for lack of a better word, assholes.
“Why don’t you pick a side?”
“But you’re dating/married to a guy so you’re straight.”
“It’s ok, you can really come out to me.”
“I don’t date bi girls because they cheat.”
Continue reading “Day 28: Coming Out as Bisexual”
Be a good person and never say these things again.
“I don’t date bisexual people. They cheat.”
My dear, people cheat regardless of sexuality. Trust me on this one. I’m speaking from experience here. I was marred to a straight guy for six years. Guess who cheated? It sure wasn’t me, the bisexual chick. Look, no matter what type of relationship you get into, (straight, gay, bi, monogamous, non-monogamous, whatever) there’s a risk your partner(s) may cheat on you. Saying you don’t date bisexual people because “they cheat” is just a cop out for being biphobic.
“Bisexual men don’t exist.”
…And the lie detector test proves, that is a lie. Bisexual men are out there. Unlike the mythical unicorn, they do exist. Unfortunately, due to the stigma surrounding being bisexual, no one is exactly sure how many bi men are out there. They are out there though and they’re judging you just as hard as I am for saying this crap.
Continue reading “10 Things Bisexual People are Sick of Hearing”